Have you ever felt a magnetic pull towards the energy between two people in a relationship rather than towards either person individually? This might sound unusual, but it’s actually a real and emerging concept in the world of sexuality called symbiosexuality. A recent study from Seattle University has shed light on this fascinating aspect of human attraction, and it’s opening up new ways to think about our desires and relationships.
What is Symbiosexuality?
In simple terms, symbiosexuality is the attraction to the dynamic and energy that exist between two people in a relationship. Instead of feeling drawn to just one person, someone who identifies as symbiosexual is attracted to the synergy of the couple’s connection. This means they find the overall energy and interaction between the two people compelling, almost as if the relationship itself is a living, breathing entity that they want to be a part of.
Dr. Sally Johnston, the researcher behind this concept, explains that this type of attraction is about connecting with the “whole” of the relationship. It’s like appreciating a beautiful painting not just for its colors or shapes but for the way the elements come together to create something greater than the sum of its parts. For symbiosexuals, the emotional and energetic interplay of the couple is what makes the attraction so strong and unique.
How Does Symbiosexuality Manifest?
Symbiosexuality can show up in various ways. Here are a few examples:
- Admiring the Couple’s Dynamic: Some people feel an intense admiration for how a couple interacts with each other. They are drawn to the way the partners share their energy and affection, and this attraction often involves wanting to be part of that dynamic.
- Desire to Join the Relationship: In some cases, a symbiosexual person might not just want to observe the couple’s connection but also wishes to be included in it. They may fantasize about being a part of the relationship, adding their own energy to the mix.
- Feeling Energized by the Relationship: Symbiosexuals often find that being around a couple can make them feel more alive and energetic. The couple’s connection can be so powerful that it positively affects their own emotional state.
The Research Behind Symbiosexuality
The study by Dr. Johnston surveyed a diverse group of participants and found that symbiosexuality is experienced by people across different ages, races, socio-economic backgrounds, and sexual orientations. The findings were published in the Archives of Sexual Behavior and provide new insights into how we think about human attraction.
Interestingly, the study revealed that many participants who identified as symbiosexual were also polyamorous and queer. They reported feeling a particular attraction to queer and non-heterosexual couples, although symbiosexuality is not limited to any specific group.
Are you Symbiosexual?
- Attraction to Couple’s Dynamics: You feel a strong draw to the energy and interaction between two people in a relationship rather than to each individual alone.
- Desire to Join the Relationship: You may wish to be part of an existing couple’s dynamic, finding fulfillment in their shared connection rather than focusing on one person.
- Energized by Relational Synergy: You experience emotional uplift and a sense of well-being from the relational energy and harmony between partners.
- Less Focus on Individual Qualities: Your attraction centers on the overall chemistry and connection between the couple rather than the specific traits of the individuals involved.
- Validation from Collective Attention: You find emotional validation and self-worth from the relational dynamic and the attention shared within the couple’s interaction.
Symbiosexuality vs. “Unicorns”
In the world of polyamory, there is a term called “unicorn” that sometimes overlaps with the concept of symbiosexuality, but with some differences. A unicorn is often someone who engages with an existing couple sexually but doesn’t participate in the broader aspects of their relationship. The term can carry a negative connotation, as it can imply that the individual is objectified or treated as an accessory rather than an equal partner.
Dr. Johnston’s study highlights that symbiosexuals are drawn to the energy of the relationship as a whole and not just seeking to be a passive participant. They are interested in the entire dynamic between the partners, which contrasts with the more transactional nature of the “unicorn” scenario.
Emotional and Social Aspects
Symbiosexuals often describe themselves as extroverted and in need of a lot of attention and intimacy. They may be less likely to experience jealousy compared to others because their attraction is more focused on the relationship as a whole rather than individual dynamics.
For many, the feeling of being desired by multiple people or being part of a couple’s energy is deeply validating. This can lead to a strong sense of emotional fulfillment, as they feel connected to the relational energy rather than just the individuals involved.
The Future of Symbiosexuality Research
As this concept gains recognition, Dr. Johnston and other researchers are keen to explore its implications further. Understanding symbiosexuality can provide insights into how people experience attraction and desire, especially in non-traditional relationship structures.
Future research aims to look into how symbiosexuality affects mental health and relationship satisfaction. By studying these aspects, researchers hope to reduce stigma and broaden our understanding of human sexuality.
Dr. Johnston’s goal is to help people see that desire can be more complex and varied than simply being attracted to one person at a time. By expanding our views, we can better appreciate the diverse ways in which people experience attraction and form relationships.
Conclusion
Symbiosexuality is a fresh perspective on how we think about attraction and relationships. It highlights the importance of the relational energy between people and suggests that our desires can be deeply tied to the dynamic of a couple’s connection. As more research unfolds, we’re likely to gain a richer understanding of this unique form of attraction and how it fits into the broader spectrum of human sexuality.
Whether you find yourself drawn to the energy between couples or are just curious about new ways of understanding attraction, symbiosexuality opens up fascinating possibilities for how we relate to one another. It challenges us to think beyond traditional frameworks and embrace a more nuanced view of desire and connection.